Dammit.  It happened.  One of the “what ifs” on the list of worries you make before getting to teacher training.  I’m injured in a way that’s going to stop me from pushing my body.  I tore my meniscus in BOTH knees—or so I thought.

We Love Dr. Preddy
Dr. Preddy was here at our training for 3 weeks to lead our anatomy classes.  Out of the goodness of his own heart, he made himself available for free adjustments (he’s a licensed chiropractor and massage therapist as well!).

I was having some trouble with my knees, so when I got my adjustment, I asked him for advice.  There was a lot of snapping and popping going on, so he believed I had a meniscal tear in my right knee and possible tear in the left knee.  I also had a Baker Cyst (gross–see photo) pop up behind my left knee.  These are usually indicators of a torn meniscus.   Dr. Preddy suggested that I see an orthopedic surgeon to get the final answer.

So, I spent pretty much all week freaking out.  I shed all my tears on Tuesday and processed the new information.  I was told I that may have to drop out (if the meniscal tears were confirmed through an MRI).   So what?  That’s it?  I get a tear and I’m out?  Yeah right.  All of this preparation for 4 weeks of yoga camp?  Even if I had to lay in savasana during every single class, I wasn’t going to leave.

Up until my appointment last Friday with the surgeon, I spent every possible minute with two huge bags of ice on my knees.  They hurt, but they didn’t hurt that bad.  I just imagined that if they were really torn, I’d be getting a jump-start on the rehab.

The VERDICT
I HAVE THE KNEE  The Orthopedic Surgeon did not believe there were any tears.  He said my body is going through a lot of stress right now and it’s showing.  The aches and pains in the knees are just from over-working.  Some of my other injuries may be due to dehydration, so that was a wake up call.  It’s difficult to stay hydrated here!  His suggestions: increase intake of electrolytes, ice as much as possible, take Advil all the time.  If the cyst gets bigger, I will have to go back to get it drained (so gross).  It will dissolve on it’s own otherwise.WHEW!!!!!!!!!!!  I was floating after that news.  I couldn’t wait to get into my 5 PM class and KILL IT!

How did I get hurt?
I have no idea.  I do know that the pain in my knees started in yoga about five months ago during standing head to knee.  My knees didn’t hurt any other time.  Just in Yoga.  Just before I came to training, I figured out that I had been placing too much weight on the outside of my standing foot.  I changed my posture and that helped, but I think it was already too late.  With two classes a day here, those injuries are not really getting the rest they need, so Advil and ice will be my buddies.

The Story of Bikram
Bikram Yoga is supposed to heal the knees among many other things.  I’ve heard many stories of how this yoga has turned some lives (including the Bikram himself).

Don’t Amput!  (That’s how Bikram says “amputate.”)
Bikram started practicing yoga at the age of 3.  He practiced at Gosh’s College of Physical Education for up to 6 hours a day.  At age 11, he became the youngest National India Yoga Champion.  At 13, he was declared King of Yogis.  As an Olympic body builder in training (18 yrs. old), he dropped 450 lbs. of weight on his knee and shattered the entire thing.  He visited doctors around the world who all told him he needed to amputate the leg.  Completely devastated, he was going commit suicide by jumping off a bridge into the Gages River.  His guru, Vishna Gosh, stopped him and made him come back to the Ashram.  After six months of intense rehab through yoga, Bikram’s knee was completely healed.

The FIRST Yoga Class Ever
Years later, Vishna-Gosh sent him to Bombay to “fix” someone through yoga.  News spread quickly about Bikram’s healing through yoga and soon after, he was working around the clock (literally no sleep).  He saw “patients” just as a Dr. would, giving each person a prescription of yoga poses.  He realized that there were too many people to help.  In 1965, he developed the 26 posture series and began teaching yoga to 30 people at a time.  Bikram developed the FIRST YOGA CLASS.  The series is designed to heal every inch of your body (if done correctly).

Bikram did not invent the yoga poses.  They have not been modified from the pure Hatha Yoga forms.  In the 15th century, Patañjali, was the first yogi to study the medical benefits of each posture.  He passed on his knowledge (written as 196 sutras).  Bikram chose postures that ANYONE could do and arranged them in a series that would benefit the entire body.  The Bikram Yoga 26 posture series is trademarked as intellectual property.  Before Bikram, yoga “classes” didn’t exist.

There are so many testimonies from Bikram Yoga.  But this is probably my favorite story:

President Nixon Saved By Bikram
In 1963, President Nixon had a blood clot.  Doctors could not fix him.  Before amputating his leg, they turned to Bikram as a last resort.  Nixon was staying at the Ala Moana Surf Rider hotel in Waikiki, Hawaii.  Bikram was sent to Hawaii to see him.  When Bikram entered Nixon’s hotel room, Bikram asked the secret service agents to leave.  They said, “No way.  We cannot leave the President alone.”  Nixon allowed it.

Nixon: “Are you a Dr.?”
Bikram: “No, I’m a Yogi.”
Nixon: “Is that like yogurt?”

Bikram gave Nixon hydrotherapy.  He placed him into a hot bathtub, led him through meditative breathing exercises (pranayama breathing) and massaged his legs.  They did this a few times a day for 3 weeks.  The president was fine.

Bikram was awarded a greencard on his departure from that trip.

Mantras For Week 5
Week 4 was confusing, emotional and hard.  I’m scared of week 5.  I’ve heard it’s hell week.  They incorporate everything into this week: demands of dialogue, exams, longer/hotter yoga classes, less sleep than ever.  Week 4 is now behind me.  So what can I take from it?

What I have learned is: if you are not doing the posture exactly right, you are not getting the physical benefits and you may injure yourself.  That’s why the classes are so strict.  So take someone like me: athletic, extremely tight, self-motivated and competitive.  If you tell me to “LOCK THE KNEE!!” I’m gonna lock it!  If you tell me to “REACH BACK, FALL BACK, WAY BACK!!!” I’m seriously gonna try to touch the wall behind me.  I LOVE the heat in Bikram because it allows someone like me (inflexible and muscular) to feel limber for an hour and a half.  BUT—I’m pushing too hard.  I have NO IDEA how to not push hard.  Maybe that’s why I’m here now—this is my new lesson to learn.

•    Learn to have much more patience.
•    Step out of the ego more often.
•    Love every part of me—even the injured knees.
•    Appreciate each setback as an opportunity to grow.
•    Meditate more and stay away from the “poor me” thoughts.
•    100% intention in EVERYTHING.

Hopefully these new found goals and lessons I will instill in myself will help me through week five…Let’s hope!!

Namaste,
Annie

We are happy to share an inspirational woman, Holly Miely! Holly, a Mika Yoga Wear-er, has rediscovered what beauty and power for women really means. Having noticed that every day roles can tend to bind and constrain women, Holly discovered the importance and necessity for women to feel feminine, and beautiful. While maintaining busy schedules and obligations, she believes we can and should all feel sexy, strong and confident. All it takes is some self expression through the power of the pole and deep stretching with Bikram Yoga.

Holly’s Inspiration

Holly or “Honey” as she has come to go by in the Pole world, believes pole dancing can provide amazing confidence into ones daily life. Honey feels pole dancing is one of the most beautiful expressions of the female form through strength, flexibility and grace. She is continually inspired by her students.

“I love to watch my students start to come out of their everyday personas and really free themselves in class. It is such an amazing transformation.”

“I’ll admit, what first drew me to pole dancing was the sexy aspect mixed with athletics and I discovered what an amazing confidence booster it was. Women (and men!) of all ages, sizes and backgrounds attend  classes and all report a feeling of sexiness and confidence they carry into their daily lives.”

Passion turned to Action

In 2008 Holly founded Honey’s PoleCate Revue, a mixed dance performance group. She is the choreographer, artistic director and lead pole dancer of the group who incorporates five different types of dance for various shows. “It is Cirque De Soleil meets Pussycat Dolls while putting together themes and costumes to create exciting, sexy shows.” Holly feels founding PoleCat Revue was a logical, intended route for her life as she has been performing in dance, ballet and ice skating since she was four. “I absolutely LOVE performing, so discovering Pole and taking it into the public seemed very natural. It has been a struggle to have pole accepted in the mainstream. A part of my job as a pole dance performer is to educate people on what pole dancing is.”

Competitive Achievements:
2012 – National Aerial Pole Art – Competitor
Pole Dancing Universe 2011, Denver, CO – Competitor
2011 American Pole Fitness Association – Elite Division Finalist
Rock The Pole, Tri-Pole Challenge 2010, Hollywood, CA – Showcase solo performer

Philosophy

For Holly, Pole Dancing is about freeing women from the constraints of life and discovering the true raw beauty and strength within themselves.

“I was raised in a generation with changing roles for women. We are about female empowerment, equality, liberation, equal rights. We moved away from traditional family values and roles and started making our own money, buying our own houses, and cars, raising our children alone; doing a lot for ourselves. Somewhere along the way, we lost some of our femininity and beauty. We got so caught up in being equal we forgot that we really aren’t. We are more beautiful, graceful, and sexy than men. We stopped looking at OURSELVES as sexual beings as that meant we were objectifying ourselves. In reality, we were taking away our own power. We ARE sexy beautiful creatures that hold the ability to have power within ourselves and over others by using what we have been given by birth. We are not men nor would I want to ever change what I am. In my form I am strong, sensual and sexy, erotic, powerful and enchanting. If I feel and own these qualities, others see them.  Confidence is by far the sexiest trait a woman can own.”

Combining Bikram Yoga & Pole

With such an athletic background, Holly had also been practicing different types of yoga. She decided to finally give Bikram a try. Hating her first class and describing it as “terrible,” she committed herself to a month, after which she would decide to continue or not. “I saw a change in my upper back and shoulder flexibility in less than two weeks of class and I quickly learned to love and even crave the heat and sweat.” Holly began going nearly every day for three months and even joining advanced classes after a month. She is thankful for Bel and Emily Carpenter who own Roaring Fork Bikram studios and have acted as her flexibility coaches and helped her mentally focus as well. She is thankful for the support she found in the Bikram studios and still continues to practice five times a week.

Thank you Holly for sharing with Mika Yoga Wear your discovery and work to strengthen and empower women worldwide!

To Contact Holly or learn about classes:

Email: poledance@comcast.net
Website: www.honeyspolefitness.com 

You Tube  * Facebook * Twitter

These AMAZING photos were taken by: Andrew Wilz www.wilzphoto.com

The Mika team has been sharing traditions our mothers and us created together and we want to hear some of yours! Have you and your mom shared special traditions throughout your years together? What have these traditions meant to you or taught you?

Respond before 5/13 and you will automatically be entered into our Mama’s Day Raffle! We are thrilled to donate an $80 shopping spree for you, your Mom or both! Using random.org, 1 lucky winner will be selected this Sunday.

Happy Mothers Day!!!

And the winner is……………………..

CONGRATULATIONS ROSE! Your response was selected! We hope you & your mom continue your mani/pedi tradition for as long as you can:)

Special thank you to everyone who shared their special stories on this post. It was incredibly touching to hear how other moms & daughters share their love with one another. So many wonderful ideas as well… I can’t wait to try some of these out & know that these responses will inspire many moms & daughters as well. Big thank you for sharing & again, HAPPY MOTHERS DAY !!!

What Is Happening to My Body??
Um.  I have a vein running from my armpit to the bottom of my abdomen.  That’s definitely never been there before.   If this happened after only 3 weeks, what the hell will I look like at the end of 9 weeks?  I’m a little scared…lol.

Castle Door – Lecture
Jim Kallet, owner of the Bikram studio in San Diego (www.bikramyogasandiego.com), gave us several lectures during week two.  Jim is amazing.  When you leave his lectures, you feel like you understand why you’re here.  One of his messages helped me with one of my greatest challenges.

He said that your body is like a big iron castle door that’s been shut for hundreds of years and yoga helps you open it.  You want to open the door, so you dab a little WD-40 on the hinges and pull as hard as you can.  It doesn’t budge.  So, you repeat this process (WD-40 and pulling) every single day for months.  Each day, the door creeks open just a half-inch.  It’s so much effort to open the damn door, but you keep at it.  One day, it completely opens!  You’re so happy!  Then, you walk in the castle only to find five more iron doors you need to open.

My body is that iron door and yoga is the WD-40.  I took Jim’s message a bit further than the body.  I’ve been working HARD on clearing out the junk in my life that’s built up over the last 30 years.  Just when I think I can celebrate because I moved past a blockage, I find another one that I wasn’t even aware of.  Lol…but that’s just how it goes.  I’m having fun on the journey.  Yoga opens the body.  Yoga opens the mind.

Challenges of Teacher Training
Week 3 = HARD.  We started our posture clinics.  The pressure is on.  Looking back at week one and two now seem like a vacation.  There’s a variety of challenges to choose from at teacher training; so don’t worry, one will fit just perfectly for you.  Here’s what I think of a few:
•    Physical challenge –This is actually the fun part for me.
•    Being apart from loved ones–Not so easy, but I appreciate practicing my independence.  I have room to grow in this area.
•    Living in a small hotel room with a stranger–Piece of cake.
•    Not surfing regularly for 9 weeks–Downer, but I’ll live.
•    Dialogue–FEAR*TORTURE*ANXIETY.

What’s The Dialogue?
44 pages of script that must be memorized verbatim.  Every Bikram yoga class is exactly the same (26 postures).  The instructors memorize this dialogue and talk for 90 minutes.  Everyone says exactly the same thing.  Here’s an example of part of the dialogue:

Continuously keep kicking without stopping, without intermission.
Kick the heel out, turn your toes in. You have to learn to flex your foot, to stretch your Achilles tendon just above the heel…..

Imagine memorizing 44 pages of THAT!

The Imperfect Perfectionist   
Hello Internet world.  Here’s something very personal about me.  Don’t judge…lol.  I may regret this post, but whatever.  It’s real.  (Warning: skip this part if it’s boring to you.   Otherwise, I promise that the story does relate to yoga.)

I REALLY struggled in school.  As much as I tried, I just couldn’t get it together.   Picture the most stressed out you’ve ever been.  Now, imagine a time in your life that you put your best effort into something and still failed.  That was me (even as an 8 year old).  But it wasn’t just once.  It was every test and quiz up until my junior year in high school.  I was my own worst critic.

In my junior year, my college adviser told me “I wasn’t’ college material.”  Soon after, I was diagnosed with a pretty serious case of ADD.  I was given Ritalin (pills are not the answer to everything, but it was the only answer I had at the time).  My GPA increased from a 1.9 to a 3.7 in one semester.  I earned a degree in Mass Communications and Marketing from F.I.U. with a 3.5 GPA.  I worked full time for a pharmaceutical company all through college and started selling pharmaceuticals when I was 21.   Despite the odds, I guess made it happen.

My First Stab at Posture Clinics
At training, we attend posture clinics daily.  Groups of 30 people sit in a small room for 3.5 hours and present sections of the dialogue one at a time.  After we present the dialogue, the trainers give us feedback.  Some people sound like pros.  Some people don’t know a single word.   The evaluation of my peers is the most freighting thing for me.  I’ve been trying to work through the anxiety of this dialogue for months now.  It’s been a distraction that has stopped me from actually learning it at the pace I should be.

During our first posture clinic, I blanked.  I KNEW the dialogue in my room.  I just couldn’t find the words when I got up in front of the group.  That night, I was completely defeated.  I went back to my room, cried and ate dark chocolate (totally pathetic).  HOW is this still haunting me at 30 years old?!!  I spent Tuesday and Wednesday getting back into my old routine of creating stress to reach success.

This is NOT the easy way.  It sucked when I was in high school.  It sucks now.

Here’s the protocol:
1.)    Get so stressed out and anxious that I feel like I’m gonna have a heart attack.
2.)    Since nobody else does this to themselves, I need to completely seclude myself during this torturous study time.
3.)    I won’t even have time to say hello to people or enjoy myself because I’ll need every second to concentrate on the task.
4.)    Forget making time for friends.
5.)    Forget making time for myself.
6.)    I’ll hold all of the tension in my back.
7.)    I’ll make sure to run my immune system into the ground so I get bronchitis.
8.)    It’s important to hold my breath for 9 weeks.  Otherwise, it won’t work.
9.)    I have to toss and turn in bed for 2 hours before I fall asleep.  It’ll be so important for me to worry about all the things I will possibly fail at.
10.)    The most critical part: worry about everything and be driven by fear.

This is the only way I’ll pass, right???

NO—FORGET THAT!  I’m not doing it anymore.  If it takes me 3 months longer to learn this dialogue, so be it.  I didn’t just quit my corporate job to create the same environment at teacher training.  This is one of the many reasons I am at this training.  I want to learn a NEW way of doing things.  I’ve spent my WHOLE life stressing myself out over tests, jobs, etc.  I’m leaving that old baggage behind.

Opening One Castle Door
On Friday, I presented Awkward pose.  I didn’t hit every single word, but I got through it with less nervousness than I ever had.  I think I actually had fun!  I didn’t beat myself up about all the errors.  It felt pretty damn good.

I had the option of presenting the next posture (Eagle pose) that day or studying over the weekend and doing it on Monday.  I really didn’t know this posture very well at all—but, I figured why not give it a try.  I was TOTALLY winging it.  I looked at the bodies and told them to do what I thought they should.   I learned more from that experience than any other posture clinic that week.  I forced myself to relax, laugh, forgive myself for errors, think on the spot and focus on the bodies.

It’s not perfect.  I need to study hard.  BUT—I think I’m finally doing what is BEST for ME.

Mind over matter

I’m Going to LOVE Being a Teacher
I met another trainee (Marisol) just before we started yoga one morning.  She said her knee really bothered her in standing head to knee. Anytime she locked her knee, she felt great pain.  As she stood in line to see the nurse for advice, I told her what helped me with my knee.

Back in January, I was having the same feeling.  No matter who I asked, I would get the same answer—“You have to lock you knee.”  Everyone assured me that the pain would go away on its own.  After 3 months of locking my knee, my pain only got worse (I was limping).  I wanted to find more information, so I decided to do the research myself.   There’s an answer for EVERYTHING online.

I realized that I was placing too much weight on the outside of my standing foot.  I was also not engaging my inner quads enough. To correct the posture, you need to put more weight on your big toe and engage the inner thigh muscle (extending from the inner knee to the groin).  It worked for me, so I shared this information with Marisol.

The next day, Marisol came up to me after a very intense Bikram class.  “OMG!!  It’s you!!  The one who helped me with my knee!!”  She said she thought about what I told her and gave it a try.  To her surprise, she hasn’t felt ANY PAIN in standing head to knee. She said I helped her change her practice and expressed her gratitude as her eyes started watering up.  I got a little emotional myself. THIS is why I’m here.  THIS is what I want to do.  I just HELPED this girl.  What an amazing feeling.  I can’t even describe it enough.  All I know is, I want to do this every single day.

Bikram is Superman
He doesn’t need sleep.  He doesn’t need food.  The man is not human.  He literally sleeps only two hours a night.  During lectures, he explains that when you’re body is completely aligned; it gets all the rest it needs during yoga.  I’d suggest googling the power of yogis.  It’s real.  Bikram teaches us that we all have energy that we don’t use because we’re not in tune with it.

What’s the Sleep Situation???
If you haven’t heard already, part of the teacher training challenge is the lack of sleep.  Every night, we have lecture from 9:30 to at least midnight.  Three-four nights a week, Bikram will keep us up with Bollywood or Mahabharata (look up for more info) movies until 1 – 3am.   Check in for our morning class begins at 8am, so you’re looking at sleeping between 4 and 7 hours a night.

Prepare For Movie Night
Me VS. cold room = NO BUENO situation.  The room is an icebox.  I take my preparation for the cold seriously: hooded parka jacket (no joke), long pants, long thigh high socks (doubled!), thermals, mint tea and dessert. I find a spot in the room where there’s an extra chair.  Once everyone is settled, I prop my feet up on the chair and get comfy.

Falling asleep in the movie is an art.  The staff walks around the room to wake people up.  If they catch you lying on the floor, you might have to do a Saturday make-up class (this hasn’t happened yet…but it’s possible).  I’ve seen people work in teams to hide a person that’s sleeping on the floor.  One person lies on the floor, underneath three people’s legs.  They rotate who gets to sleep on the floor.  Hey, if it gives you an extra hour sleep, it could be worth it.  I haven’t been tired enough to try it.Another tactic is yoga in the bathroom.  It’s often said that 30 seconds in Ardha-Kurmasana is equivalent to getting 8 hours of sleep.  So, you might find girls in the bathroom sneaking in some yoga poses.

Method to the Madness
Bollywood movies sound like torture, but I actually enjoy them (and many people do).  I didn’t understand it going into training, but now it makes perfect sense.  Bikram is trying to teach us a few things with the movies and lack of sleep.
1.)    Every movie has some kind of lesson in it.
2.)    Understanding Indian culture is part of connecting with yoga.
3.)    Discipline—something many of us could use more of.
4.)    Breaking habits and becoming more efficient.

We THINK we need 8 hours of sleep.  He explains that we (Westerners) don’t know how to process our emotional baggage.  Stress, anxiety, etc., have such a negative impact on our bodies.  WE need the sleep because it’s how we recover.  Once you’re practicing yoga twice a day, you are more at ease, your body is aligned and working more efficiently.  After two weeks of very little sleep, I am proof that he’s right.

For Those Who Fear Sleep Deprivation
In the past, if I didn’t get a full night sleep (at least 7-8 hours), I would feel terribly hung-over the next day.  Sleep deprivation would leave me with zero concentration, low motivation, larger appetite, poor mood, slow digestion, aching body and little to no energy for exercise.  To my surprise, I’ve only felt a little groggy in the mornings.  After the 8am yoga class, I am more energized than I’ve ever felt in my life.  I will be keeping a journal of my sleep patterns, so you’ll have an accurate idea of what it’s like.

Love Your Pain VS. Hate Your Pain
It’s easy to make an undesirable situation miserable by resisting it.  Like, “This Bollywood movie is cutting into my precious sleep time and that sucks.”  About an hour into the first movie night, I figured that I needed to shut off the negative internal dialogue because it wasn’t serving me.  I figured, I can sit here and be miserable the whole time, or I can accept it and just go with the flow.  It’s been much more enjoyable when I’ve made the conscious decision to accept the situation.  I can probably practice that thinking more often when I go home.

For many yoga practitioners, Namaste has come to be a greeting gesture for hellos and good byes, often recognized as marking the beginning and end of each class. “Nama” means bow, “as” means I, and “te” means you. Therefore, Namaste literally means “bow me you” or “I bow to you.” The gesture acknowledges the belief that there is a divine essence within each of us.

Yoga instructor, Mary Fischer, explores how one can move past the casual use of this word, and offers her insight on how to Embody Namaste.

Step 1: Acknowledge one’s own inner light.
Yoga is a beautiful way to explore this. One of the primary themes of yoga is to discover stillness to find the truth of who you really are. During these moments of stillness, it is said that our inner vibration of truth can be found. So, step one: Find, discover, or acknowledge your inner light. In acknowledging your own inner light, it is then possible to see that same flame of life within others.

Step 2: Forgive.
Forgive your soul for any regrets that are holding you back from fully manifesting your light. This can be really hard to do! It’s impossible to move on to the present moment if you’re still wrestling with your past. Let it go and forgive. Only when you can fully forgive the transgressions of your own heart, can you truly forgive those of another.

Step 3: Love.                                                                                                                                                                                           Learn to love your light and your journey for exactly what it is. When you stop fighting the currents of life, and just embrace your inner beauty, this new-formed freedom will kindle the spark of your heart & let your fire blaze. No life is perfect, and nobody is expected to be either. Forgive, accept, and love the beautiful vibration that is you. Only when you learn to love yourself, mistakes and all, can you learn to fully love another.

In a nutshell: Acknowledge, Forgive and Love.
Acknowledge your divine essence within, and you will easily find that same divine essence within others. Forgive your heart and your past, and you will more easily forgive those who have hurt you. Love your spirit and your journey, so that the power of love can more fully envelop all those around you. When you have learned to honor the light within, it will become second nature to honor that same divine light within others.

“I honor the place within you, in which the entire universe dwells. I honor the place in you, which is of love, light, truth, and of peace. When you are in that place in you, and I am in that place in me, we are one.” Namaste.

What do we eat?

We’re spending all of this energy treating our bodies like a temple.  So, when it’s time to eat, why wouldn’t we take the quality of our food just as seriously?  I want whole foods, enzymes, minerals, organic, grass-fed, range-free, gluten-free, etc.  I feel a difference when I eat correctly, so don’t mess with my food.

All I can say is, we are not supposed to cook in the room.  I have eaten very well.    As for other people, I have seen them walk to subway twice a day, order delivery thai food, get room service or walk down to the grab and go option in the hotel.

What is the torture chamber like?

I learned that no class would be the same, so I dropped my expectations.  Here’s a glimpse of how the first two days felt.  I have dramatically improved over the week.

Bikram Class Day 1—Panic Attack.

First, I should give you a little medical background.  I’m anemic and I have very low blood pressure.  I’ve been working to reverse the anemia for the last 3 months, but it does take a long time.  There’s not enough blood pumping through my body, so I don’t get as much oxygen as I should.  Therefore, it’s easy for me to become dizzy.

I’m finally here in humongous yoga room with chandeliers and a million mirrors.  Bikram’s podium towers over the room about 7 ft high.  There’s a plush couch on the podium for him and his assistant rushes around to make sure he’s got a bucket of ice and hot tea.  He sits under an air-conditioned vent, which prevents his hair from being damaged by the heat.

So, first thing’s first.  Where the hell do I put my mat?  I opted for the fourth row, a little bit off to the left side.  I’d say it’s a dangerous area–still close enough for Bikram to yell at you, but far enough from the podium blend in a little.

We start pranayama breathing and I notice how nervous I am.  For whatever reason, the fear kicked in.  By the second set of breathing, I was feeling light-headed.   “This CAN’T be happening,” I thought.  If I ever feel faint, it’s usually after standing bow posture.  This has NEVER happened so early.  The worries, fears, what ifs started flooding through my brain about being the first of 450+ trainees to faint.  I saw black spots in my vision, felt tingly all over and darkness coming out of the corners of my eyes.  I fought it so hard.  “This is NOT happening.  This is NOT happening.”  I took a knee as much as possible and this did help.  Problem was, it didn’t just feel like any dizziness I had experienced.  I had weird, new symptoms.  My hearing was muffled and it would go in and out of complete deafness.  My vision was not only spotty, but it was distorted—like I had just walked into Bikram’s Carnival House of Mirrors.  I felt like I was getting ZERO oxygen.  I imagined that if I could rip my sports bra off, my lungs could somehow get more oxygen.

I managed to make it through the class without passing out or Bikram yelling at me.  It was the hardest class in my life.   I didn’t know what was going on when it happened, but I’m pretty sure I had my first panic attack in my first class with Bikram.

BIkram always says, “Your mind is your worst enemy.”  My fears brought me straight into a state of panic.  This would be a perfect example of what he means by that.  I’m convinced that my hardest class is behind me.  I learned some valuable lessons from that one.

Bikram Class Day 2—Yeah, it’s a torture chamber.

I’d say about 25 people needed assistance outside of the room (from fainting or throwing up).  About 20% of the room was leaving in the middle of class to get fresh air.  During one of the floor postures, I swear I looked up and saw at least half the room taking a break.  At one point, I saw a girl sitting up, crying her eyes out.  During the final savasana, Bikram played a song for us, which felt like it was 15 minutes long.  We were forced to listen to it.  I looked over at my roommate and she was laughing hysterically.  Strange things happen to people when they are put through this kind of torture.  Sometimes emotions come out in different ways (like crying or laughing).  The class was two hours long.

To my surprise, the outside waiting area was filled with trainees laying on their mats in silence.  Dozens of people were too tired to walk back to their rooms.  Everyone had a look of complete exhaustion and defeat on their faces.  Other people were proactively waiting in line to get ice for the next class. I felt the same energy coming from every person.  One girl was crying to herself in the corner.  Others were comforting those people who had fainted and were carried out in class.  I just watched.  At this point, it became so real–game on.

That class changed my practice forever.  The standing series was difficult for me as usual, but my floor series was pretty solid.   Once I realized that it was hard for everyone; it gave me the confidence boost I needed to finish strong.

I feel like I grew stronger physically and mentally every day.  I figured that I wouldn’t get another opportunity to learn from Bikram like this.  I might as well stick myself right in front of his face.  So, I’ve stood in the front-center for his classes and worked my butt off.  Bikram takes you to a whole new level.

So why are we doing this?

I’ll have to devote an entire blog entry for that answer, so here’s quick version.  There are over 450 people here from all over the World.  Despite the aches, pains, fainting, tears, lack of sleep, thirst, heat, etc.; I don’t think there’s a single person here that doesn’t WANT to be here.  Coming here is truly the best thing I could have ever done for myself (and I’m having a BLAST).  Ulysses, one of our teachers this week said, “Stay close to Bikram’s teaching.  You will miss him when you leave.”    I know I will.

1.   Hey boobs with black shorts, yeah you, hips more forward!
2.   You in the front row, is this your first Bikram yoga class?
3.   I am the most famous person in the world.
4.   The most important thing in life is LIFE!
5.   Forget about everyone at home.  Nobody cares about you.  Nobody is missing you.
6.   You cannot change the dialogue.  You cannot put chicken curry on sushi.
7.   What is Yoga? Everything!
8.    It is the most difficult thing in the World to keep the mind in the brain.
9.   Yoga is the perfect marriage between mind and body.
10.  Your spirit hates you.
11.   99% right is 100% wrong.
12.   Never too sick, never too old, never too late . . . to start from scratch again.
13.   You don’t follow the world.  The world will follow you.
14.   Bikram yoga is like driving a new car out of the dealership with Zero miles on it.
15.    I am the only one that will tell you the truth! Even your mother lied to you…
16.    All your life you pulling every body else leg, now you pull your own!
17.    Your body is a toilet.  24 hours a day you, dump garbage into it.  Once a day you must flush it, with yoga.
18.    The hardest thing to do in a Bikram class is listen.
19.    No food is the best food.
20.    I can make you do it!
21.    Fear and anxiety is all based on past experience. Let it go. You are no longer in the past.
22.    In your country; you born baby, you die baby.
23.    No space for chicken shit.
24.    I don’t like cold weather, cold food, cold heart and a cold….
25.    Did I make my point?!  Yes or no?!
26.    #1 infection in the world is discrimination.
27.    You think you have a choice? I kill you.
28.    You wish me dead.  But even I dead I come back and tell you lock your leg.
29.    No problem is a problem if you don’t try and solve it.
30.    When nothing works, this works.
31.    Your spirit and god hate you for having to live in your …. body.
32.    Junk body, screw loose brain, lost soul.
33.    What the &*%k#@! hell were you doing?

My Story

Yoga came into my life at a very young age. When I was ten, I witnessed a horrible trauma, and suffered a great amount of stress and fear thereafter. I was thirteen when my mom brought home a yoga tape for me to try out. That hour of moving, breathing, and relaxing into savasana was the first time since the incident, that I felt safe, and a sense of peace. I was totally hooked! I continued to practice and ventured out to yoga classes at my local gym. The peace my yoga teacher held was inspiring; I wanted a piece of that! My practice was the only time during my busy day that I could sit, breathe and connect to something bigger than myself.

I started teaching yoga during the Spring of my Freshman year of college. Although it was my dream, my teaching became another activity to cram into my already daunting schedule. As time went on and school became harder, my never-resting lifestyle eventually caught up with me. My sleeping disorder that I had developed as a child returned in full force. I tried to address my insomnia desperately with anything I could and the disorder eventually snowballed out of control. Mid-way through my senior year I wound up in the ER after four completely sleepless nights. I dropped all my classes, quit all my jobs and moved home. Let me tell you, there is no better way to understand the power of yoga than hitting rock bottom and letting it build you back up. My ego was killed, I was raw, I was humbled. I saw what my rat race of a lifestyle had got me- nothing. I saw the meaningless of this world’s definition of “success.”

In my darkest hour, I realized only one thing mattered- God. I realized how my thoughts had created my situation and my reality. I found that the lifestyle I had grown accustomed to was killing me from the inside out. It had left no genuine time for prayer, contemplation, or peace. With the help of an amazing Aryuvedic doctor, I approached my situation holistically and naturally. Meditation and Yoga became my spiritual route, healing me from the inside. My mind became clear and my heart took the drivers seat. I learned to surrender and in that found strength and peace. The focus in my life was now clear. I believe God dwells within me, so I must always honor my body and mind and do what I need to stay balanced and healthy. I also understand that God dwells within every soul, so I want to always try to honor and respect the light within others.

Yoga continues to transform my life. Teaching from my heart is almost more fun than practicing myself. I love sharing yoga with others because I believe it is a beautiful practice to re-discover your light within. As a teacher, I want my students to know that I am not perfect; I am human- and although my life does not always go as planned- I have learned to love and accept my journey, exactly as is. Namaste!

Passion turned to Action

Yoga Swell is my passion turned into action. It is a freelance yoga company that offers private and group lessons. The goal is to reach those who need yoga the most, but are unlikely to find themselves in a yoga studio. Classes can be held at the client’s home or out in nature, all with the intention of serving the client’s needs. Sessions are co-created, offering a fun and creative experience for the practitioner.

Another awesome aspect about Yoga Swell is the outreach. Swelling the good vibes of yoga shouldn’t be attached to a pay check- this is really where my love can be found. Each month I seek to partner with a local charity, organization, or individual to raise awareness or fund raise for their need. Currently, I am working with Off the Mat, Into the World, for the 2012 Global Seva Challenge for India; which raises money and awareness for the human trafficking epidemic. The goal is to raise $20,000 and all of the proceeds go towards empowering and rehabbing the survivors of sex slavery. (I need all the help I can get, so if you’re interested, please contact me!) Yoga is a beautiful experience and opportunity to re-discover your inner light, and allow it to grow and shine, carrying your passion and inspiration out into the world. Let your yoga transform you and see what you can do, when you let your yoga swell.

Yoga is a beautiful experience and opportunity to re-discover your inner light, and allow it to grow and shine. Let your yoga transform you and see what you can do, when you let your yoga swell.

Want to find out more about Mary and her company, Yoga Swell? Check out www.yogaswell.com!

Who am I?

My name is Annie Diaz and here is a little about myself:

• Surfer girl at heart.  Here is a glimpse of my life in the water: http://freedomridinghawaii.com/team/annie/
• Born in Miami (Cuban).
• I lived in Hawaii for 5 years (North Shore, Oahu).  I moved to Newport Beach last summer.
• I fell in love with the hot room 3 years ago and made a personal goal to attend Bikram Teacher Training some day.
• I’m a studio owner in progress!  My long-term objective is to open my own Bikram Studio.
• Adios corporate ladder, but thanks for teaching me about business!  Pharmaceutical rep to Bikram Yoga Instructor.  I want to spread Yoga, not pharmaceuticals.
• I LOVE yoga, the ocean, being FIT and life.

Corporate Suit vs. Hot Yoga Shorts

Structure.

I turned 30 last August.  So, what have I done in the past 10 years?  I earned my degree in Marketing and Advertising from F.I.U.  My academic passions were more in line with “exercise physiology” or “nutrition,” but I went after the most promising paycheck—a business degree.  I’ve have held some sort of well-paying, structured, stressful job since I was 19.  Like most 2^nd generation Cuban families, everything you have comes from a lot of elbow grease.  There aren’t any trust funds.  Success was my top priority in my early 20’s.  I became a pharmaceutical sales rep at 21—a dream come true at the time.  I began building the structure in my life, which was very important to me.

Freedom. 

It wasn’t long before I started seeking the Freedom element of my life.  I started surfing in Miami around 12.  There’s nothing I love more than the ocean and surfing. Miami is just about the worst place for any surfer to live because it’s usually flat.  At 25, I asked for a job transfer to Hawaii.  Hawaii would allow me the structure of my corporate job in an environment that was easy to maintain freedom and passion through surfing.  I surfed before and after work every day—and that was the ultimate dream (or so it was at the time).  Hawaii led me through endless lessons about nutrition, purpose, happiness and the bigger picture.

Passion.

Once again, I wondered if I could make my life even better.  What if I found a profession that I had Passion for?  As news about the pharmaceutical industry unveiled a very ugly side of prescription medications and over-prescribing, I became less interested in persuading physicians to prescribe my drugs.  Quite frankly, I just didn’t feel right about the whole thing.  I felt that my job was completely self-serving and directly contributing to a big monster (people feeling that they need medications).  How was I making my mark as an individual?  Where is my purpose?  Did I really want to be a pharm rep forever?  How could I design a profession that gave me freedom, purpose AND high income?  I spent 5 years contemplating those questions.  Yes, it took me FIVE years to get here.  What a process it has been—and still will be.  In December 2011, I finally made the decision to register for Spring 2012 teacher training.  Two weeks ago, I resigned from pharma.  In three days, I begin a journey that is fueled by passion, purpose, intention, hope and $20K to my name.  Sound scary?  You bet it’s scary.  But it’s also the best thing I could have ever done for myself.  I am sure of that.  I won’t make the income I’m used to this year, but I am ok with that.  I might not ever make the same amount of money, but that’s not what this is about.  I’m following my passions.  Just maybe…success will follow.

Does this girl think she’s all that?

I call it a curse.  I’m obsessed with business ideas.  I’m sure it can be annoying for friends to listen to me blab about my newest “Zuckerbergian” idea (Mark Zukerburg—the genius who invented Facebook).  But sometimes, it works out quite well—like my affiliation with Mika. I’d like to thank you Mika for providing me with the opportunity to do this guest blog series and providing me with my outfits for the training!

I want to make something clear—I am NOT the best Bikram yoga trainee.   I’m “okay” at yoga.  Flexibility is not my forte, but that’s exactly why I NEED yoga in my life (and why I like a very hot room…lol).  I am, however, extremely passionate about yoga and making the best out of this life.  I am just like any other Bikram trainee.  We are all going to training for unique reasons.  No one is better or worse.

I want to hear from YOU!

I’m apologizing in advance for symptoms of yoga brain over the next 9 weeks.  Updating this my blog once a week (on Sundays) will be a great outlet for me, but I know I will be incredibly fatigued at times.  It’s my goal to provide useful information that’s somewhat entertaining to read.  If you like me, hate me, want me to write about a particular topic or just have questions about training, please feel free to contact me directly anytime.  I love new friends on facebook and I want to hear your stories too, so don’t be shy (search Annie Gloria Diaz).   I’m very open, so ask away.

What has helped me so far

The facebook forum for Bikram trainees.  There is a ridiculous amount of information exchanged on this forum.  It’s also been a great way to meet other trainees and teachers.
Finding a roommate.  The facebook forum was the best tool for this.  I wrote to a few people that looked like a good match for me.  We asked each other questions like, “Do you snore?” “Are you clean?” “How old are you?” “Do you have kids or are you married?”  It’s easy to get a feel for someone by the photos or interactions they have on FB.  Amy Bergen is my roommate and she is AWESOME.  LOVE her.  I feel like we are already very good friends.
Room alone?  I thought about getting a room all to myself, but I think the roommate factor is a very important component of the experience.
Dialogue.  My best advice is to learn it before training.  I can’t say that I’ve taken my own advice though…lol.  Some people know the entire thing already and some haven’t memorized a word.  I am almost finished with the standing series.  It has not been sinking in easily with the whirlwind of personal changes going on.  I know it will be easier when I’m around 400+ people reciting dialogue in their sleep.
Talk to as many people as possible.  That’s pretty much my go-to rule for many things I want to learn more about.  Pick out people you look up to and ask them to mentor you.  Before each yoga class, ask the teacher to keep an eye on you and welcome his/her critiques.  Some people will help and some won’t.  Bikram can be a little competitive. We are all going to be searching for jobs when we graduate, so that’s how it goes.
Remind yourself why you wanted to do this in the first place.  It can be easy to forget the initial excitement if you’re giving up a lot (like a career).
Talk to people that are positive and supportive about your decision.  Do you know how many times I’ve heard, “Why would you quit your job to become a yoga instructor?  There’s no money in yoga.”  Everyone has a different set of values.  When you surround yourself with people who are supportive, you’re going to love your decision that much more.
Read every blog you can.
This was the most useful list I’ve found (from Steve Havner, Bikram teacher): https://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=323692637690402
Don’t overstretch.  I’m just getting over two injuries from pushing it too hard, too soon (pulled groin and strained knee).  I am naturally muscular, tight and extremely competitive.  I’m starting to learn how to listen to my body and breathe into my practice (rather than using strength).

We want to wish Annie & all of the trainees the best of luck… you are all in for an unforgettable wild ride! <3 & Happiness being sent your way:)